For most of my life I have been branded and labled. For merely existing! I recall times in my younger years, around when I was 11 of being branded a Sadistic Monster for blacking out on my then abusive stepfather... Then Schizophrenic when I nearly blacked out on my brother in 2015. Now in 2025, those old labels still echo in my family, and now online. Was it by my own, subconscious, design? Or maybe my family and friends are in contact... They act the same towards me, over the same things. To the point of feeling targeted. Oh well, I must focus on myself! I have cut off these supposed 'friends' permanently. No more will they drag me to their level to stroke their own ego. They do not know my past and do not believe I have been through this before... Many times have I cut off friends and restarted, for even less! I suppose this time will be different, though, as I am getting my core/original self back for some reason. It wasn't even planned, I've just randomly started pulling fragments from my past and present together, and I've been releasing alot of trauma... Alot. Am I finally not so self-destructive? That would be... Freeing. "Pain is subjective" he said, then. Fuck off. I have Objectively been through more than you, and you even proclaim that my then abusive step-father was a Good Man, and never laid a hand on me. Yet you undermine me and my connections with my friends, and even talk to them to this day... You exclaim you know every detail about me, and my Psyche, and my emotions. You exclaim my BPD episodes are merely the emotional outbursts of a child, even to this day as I near my thirties. All for what? A performative Patrick Bates mask? How Normal you are. <- towards another of my own brothers (Who only views me as a Half-Brother. He made this very clear in the past.)
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