After 20~ days of me worrying about my friend, he up and blocked me. Maybe I'm too kind, and I need to stop being so invested in other human beings at all. Stupid un-evolved apes; the lot of them. I'm fine besides feeling like my entire body is crawling, its a very unpleasant, unholy feeling: a feeling of crawling skin, guilt, falling, and a vague "shift" as if my body was in a chromatic shift. This will probably persist for a while but I'm used to it! I spent the entirety of 2024 in this state, not to mention the events of 2023, 2022, 2021, 2020, 2017, 2016, 2015, 2013, 2008, 2007, 2006 that produced similar. It does seem to compound the past ones though, which also sucks.
It sucks I had such a fake friend for that long, especially one I actually respected and liked to talk to a lot despite being constantly overwhelmed by them. This boulder is annoying, someone remove it from me pleaseeee
They probably actually only saw me as a joke this entire time and was using me for their amusement. I wonder if they were using me for attention during their "suicidal" episodes. How amusing! And boring. Sigh.
Forward, I march foolishly